2024-04-18

anond:20240418155929

大変申し訳ございませんでした。

土下座謝罪させて頂きます

その方法は、中国より古来から伝わる「三跪九叩頭の礼」をもってして深き謝意を表させて頂きます

なお、表記を簡潔にするためにシェイクスピア言語記述させていただきます

The Prostration and Obeisance


Act I: The Ritual.


Scene I: The Preparation.


[Enter The Counter and The Inner Counter]


The Counter:

You are as brave as the sum of your fat little stuffed misused dusty old rotten codpiece and a beautiful fair warm peaceful sunny summer's day. You are as healthy as the difference between the sum of the sweetest reddest rose and my father and yourself! You are as cowardly as the sum of yourself and the difference between a big mighty proud kingdom and a horse. Speak your mind!


[Exit The Inner Counter]


Scene II: The First Prostration.


The Counter:

You are as brave as the sum of your fat little stuffed misused dusty old rotten codpiece and a beautiful fair warm peaceful sunny summer's day. You are as healthy as the difference between the sum of the sweetest reddest rose and my father and yourself! You are as cowardly as the sum of yourself and the difference between a big mighty proud kingdom and a horse. Speak your mind!

Open your mind

Let us return to Scene II.


[Enter The Inner Counter]


The Inner Counter:

You are as vile as the sum of a cursed old rotten buried smelly half-faced plague-infested contaminated toad and a beautiful healthy honest trustworthy noble golden-hearted angel. Speak your mind!

Open your mind

You are as cowardly as the sum of yourself and a pig. Speak your mind!

Open your mind

You are as vile as the sum of a stinking foul infected curse and a beautiful healthy honest trustworthy noble golden-hearted angel. Speak your mind!

Open your mind

Let us return to Scene II.


[Exit The Inner Counter]

Let us return to Scene II.


Scene III: The Second Prostration.


[Repeat Scene II, replacing "First" with "Second"]


Scene IV: The Third Prostration.


[Repeat Scene II, replacing "First" with "Third"]


Scene V: The Rising.


The Counter:

You are as good as the sum of a happy brave sweet gentle peaceful honest trustworthy noble golden-hearted king and a rose. Speak your mind!


[Exeunt]

以上を持ちまして、「三跪九叩頭の礼」とさせて頂きます

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